Sometimes You Get Stuck...Sometimes You Feel Clueless.
I’m here to tell you a story. You’ve made it from the social media post, email, or word of mouth to this page and instead of perusing the post and moving on you are reading it. So for those that are reading, take a moment to pat yourself on the back. We are in this thing together; till the end.
The story I want to tell you is hilarious, embarrassing, and most likely relatable.
It was a cold December day. The kind of day where the cold stings, the sky is grey, and your alarm clock is truly your worst enemy. Black coffee was poured, the car was started, and we were headed off down the road for the Hunt woods. It was about 5:30 am, I was barely awake, and Randy Travis was singing some sort of sad love song through my speakers. Robert, my cousin softly snored in the passenger seat.
With an easy drive from Boone and Charlotte our hunting lease in Southern VA had become a meeting ground for family and friends. It was and is the ultimate destination to get away and scratch your outdoor itch. As we pulled up to the gate to the farm, Robert jumped out to open it. The rain had turned the road into a mud bog and the stream slowly meandered through the middle of the road. I made it through (barely) and started up the hill at a strong pace. As we headed up the hill towards the old graveyard, my car started to slide backwards. Robert and I looked at each other and both said something under our breath as the car slid into a pile of barbwire, rusted old metal, and debris. Freezing wind and daybreak met me as I climbed out and sloshed over to the other side of my car to inspect the damage. Shoot. “Hey man, I am so stuck. We need to call the others to pull me off this stuff,” I said as I wiped sleep from my eyes. Hours later after being rescued and laughed at, my car was ready to go.
By this point it was mid-morning. The hunt was a wash and we decided to give it up and head back to town for a much needed breakfast and more coffee. There was only one problem. I had to go back down the road I came in on. I stared down the barrel of this muddy road that was also covered in cow...um...well you can imagine what it was. I goosed it and headed down the road toward the gate.
That same familiar whine began to sing out and my car slid into a fence and bottomed out in the back. Laughter, erupted from the peanut gallery that had formed on the hill. I crawled out of my car, Duke’s of Hazard style, and surveyed the damage...again. “Hey bud, you’re gonna have to crawl under your car to get it unstuck. That's going to be terrible the ground is covered in” I cut him off “I know”! I rolled up my sleeves, grabbed the chain and crawled through the nastiness to hook up my car. After that I had to ride back to town in the back of the truck because I stunk to high-heaven. The story gets worse but I’ll spare you the details. If you see me ask me for the rest.
This situation is unique but it also feels all too relatable. Time-after-time I find myself in a situation where I can’t get anything right. I feel like I have no direction. I honestly just feel stuck. Part of me feels like this is because I am 23, interning, a fellow, and living in someone's guest room. I have few things figured out. I believe the lie that I have to be accomplished, established, and all-knowing.
What a foolish thing to think. And the pressure of these thoughts then causes one to miss out on the present. I often catch myself doing this. In this season of life I choose to revel in the unknown. I choose to embrace the questions about my future. I choose to be aware of what I do not know. I choose to believe that my name is written in the book of life, but rather the book of my current circumstance...and let’s be honest. Stupidity.
If you are 23 or 63 I think that everyone feels stuck or confused or simply stupid from time-to-time. I say embrace it. Ask yourself what God is trying to teach you. Meet a bunch of different people and gain some perspective. Being stuck is not a bad thing. If anything you’ll look back on the seasons where you feel most stuck and long for them. I long for them because it is where I tend to grow most. So in this season I say, "hurray." Amen. Thank you Jesus and praise the Lord! Stuck I may feel, but growing I am!